by As we start this new year, many of you are thinking about resolutions and goals. Maybe last year you resolved to lose 10 pounds and now you’re thinking, “Great, only 18 to go.” Whatever is on your mind today, I hope you’ll join us for this new series on the 12 Steps.
Why the 12 Steps?
Some of you might be wondering why we’re going through the 12 steps from Alcoholics Anonymous and similar recovery programs. “I’m not an addict,” you’re thinking. “Why do I need this?”
Here’s the truth: more of us are addicted to things than we realize. Almost everyone has something in their life they do without thinking that affects them negatively. Something you want to stop but just can’t.
Every new year, it’s the same goals: pray more, read the Bible more, exercise more, save money instead of spending. Year after year, the same resolutions, yet you’re still the same. Why? Because sometimes willpower just isn’t enough.
The Man with the Withered Hand
Let me share a story from Matthew 12. Jesus enters a synagogue and sees a man with a shriveled hand. In that culture, physical deformities meant you were cursed by God, an outsider. This man showed up week after week, hiding his hand, ashamed.
Then Jesus arrives, his one chance for healing. And what does Jesus do? He shines a spotlight on the very thing this man wants to keep hidden. In front of everyone, Jesus says, “Stretch out your hand.”
Imagine that moment. The thing you’re most ashamed of, the thing you desperately want to hide, Jesus asks you to reveal it. Do you trust him enough to stretch out your hand and receive healing?
That’s why we’re going through the 12 steps. We’re all that person with something we want to keep hidden. Jesus offers freedom and healing, but it requires us to stretch out our hand, to be honest about what we’re most ashamed of, to shine a spotlight on what we’ve kept in darkness.
What Is Addiction, Really?
The Cleveland Clinic defines addiction as “a chronic condition involving compulsive seeking and taking of substances or performing of an activity despite negative or harmful consequences.”
If that’s addiction, then most of us probably have one. It’s the late-night snacking, binging Netflix for hours, endless phone scrolling, ignoring family to watch the game. These things negatively impact our health and relationships.
You can be addicted to substances like alcohol, caffeine, nicotine, or prescription drugs. But you can also be addicted to behaviors: gambling, overeating, exercise, sex, pornography, video games, social media scrolling.
Signs you might have a problem: inability to stop, increased tolerance, intense focus that consumes your time, lack of control, personal problems affecting work and relationships, withdrawal symptoms.
Step Zero: Admitting We’re Not Fine
Before we even get to step one, there’s step zero: admitting that despite all appearances, we’re not fine.
Some of us are great at wearing masks, pretending everything’s perfect. Step zero is admitting we’re not good, not okay, that there is a problem we want to keep hidden.
Jesus asked a simple question in John 5: “Do you want to get well?” The man couldn’t even answer yes, he came up with excuses. Sound familiar? Deep down we all want to change something, but do we really? Or have we grown comfortable in our dysfunction, found a home in that ditch?
Jesus said, “It’s not those who are well who need a doctor, but those who are sick.” If you’re willing to admit you need help, Jesus is right there saying, “Stretch out that hand.”
Step One: Powerless and Unmanageable
Here’s step one: We admitted we were powerless over [fill in the blank], and that our lives had become unmanageable.
Nobody likes feeling powerless. We want control. But control is an illusion. We are powerless over the TikTok algorithm, over hitting “next episode” on Netflix, over clicking “buy now” on Amazon.
Addiction is a disease of mind, body, and spirit. It’s a spiritual problem. And the number one enemy of your spirit? Yourself. Your ego.
Your ego has a three-pronged attack: self-centeredness (making everything about you), the illusion of control (convincing you everything’s manageable), and denial of insufficiency (making you think you’re stronger than you are, better than others).
As one saying goes: If your ‘self’ could have helped your ‘self,’ wouldn’t your ‘self’ have done it by now? Your best thinking got you here. Why would you rely on yourself to get you out?
The Struggle Paul Described
This isn’t new. Paul wrote in Romans 7: “I do not do the good I want to do, but I practice the evil I do not want to do… What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?”
Paul describes the exact struggle we all face, knowing what we need to do but unable to do it, falling right back into those habits. We’re all addicted to the cycle of sin and death. Ian Cron says another name for addiction is sin.
His conclusion? “Thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
Your ‘self’ cannot save your ‘self.’ If it could, it would have already.
Surrender
Step one can be summed up in one word: surrender.
When Paul prayed about his thorn in the flesh, God replied, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.”
Do you want to get well? Then you must surrender. Wave the white flag. Stop fighting that battle between you and your ego because you cannot save yourself.
It’s in that moment when you embrace your weakness and powerlessness that God steps in and says, “My power is perfected in your weakness.”
Stretch out your hand. Make that first step today.
Prayer for Step One:
Father God,
I admit I am powerless.
I admit that my life is unmanageable when I try to control it.
Help me this day to understand the true meaning of powerlessness
and remove from me all of my denial.
Amen.
LISTEN TO OR WATCH THE FULL SERMON HERE
Daniel N. Lee 
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